


It's (Not) Over, Isn't It?

by shnuffeluv



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Background Deceit Sanders, Conventions, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Fandom, Friendship, Gen, Inspired By Tumblr, Skype, Social Media, Steven Universe References, Suicide Attempt, Transphobia, Tumblr, Villain Deceit Sanders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-28
Updated: 2018-08-28
Packaged: 2019-07-03 15:28:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 15,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15821715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shnuffeluv/pseuds/shnuffeluv
Summary: Patton, Logan, Roman, and Virgil are four friends spread across two continents, all sharing a love for one thing: Steven Universe. These four go from mere acquaintances to fast friends as they learn more about themselves, and each other. But will their friendship alone be enough to get through the bad times? And will they ever get to meet each other face-to-face?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written For the Sanders Sides Big Bang Challenge, a very special thank you to lovelylogans on Tumblr and [their post](https://lovelylogans.tumblr.com/post/170364975401/lovelylogans-fic-i-wanna-write-fandom-au-ft) which prompted this (very loosely-based) idea, and their permission for me to use it! Hopefully I’ll do it justice!

Patton sighed as he entered his dorm room. Another day of classes, of teachers going over concepts he had studied madly the night before and still barely understood, and the few friends he had at school were all busy, either in ROTC at this time of day or still in class. That’s what he got for finishing his classes at two in the afternoon, he supposed--he had the afternoons to have fun, but no one to have fun with.

Dropping his backpack on his bed, he got back onto Tumblr to see what his online friends were doing. He knew that _sherlock-deserved-better_ was usually online at this time, it being just past seven in the evening where they lived.

Sure enough, the first thing Patton saw when he checked his dashboard was a post by them, examining the meta of using Crofter’s in a recent animatic. Patton giggled a little bit--he knew Logan bought Crofter’s online and had it shipped overseas in order that they could enjoy it. They had moved to England when they were thirteen, and Patton admired how much they had taken it in stride. If Patton had to be more than three hours from anyone he knew outside his family, he might have cried. No, he _definitely_ would have cried.

He really wanted to message Logan, and had for a while, but he could never find the courage to do it. The most interaction he did was reblog their posts, usually with a pun and a compliment on his work. He got to the end of the meta and clicked reblog, typing _when it comes to theories, you’re never JAMMED up, huh?_ And putting it proudly on his blog.

Within the minute there was a little ‘fwip!’ noise from his computer, and Patton looked at confusion in his messages, which now had a cheery little 1 above them. He hesitantly opened them. _sherlock-deserved-better: jammed? really? i would have thought you of all people would have a better pun than that_

Patton shoved his hands up to his mouth and squealed into them. _Ohmygosh, ohmygosh, ohmygosh THEY MESSAGED ME!!!_ he thought desperately.

_i-will-physically-hug-you: well, you know me, i just sorta say whatever i think!_

_sherlock-deserved-better: yes, i see your reblogs frequently. sometimes the puns are a little much, but publicity is publicity. you have quite the popular blog_

_i-will-physically-hug-you: oh! do you want me to stop making the puns? i can stop!_

_sherlock-deserved-better: no, the puns are fine. they’re actually quite...quaint. it’s interesting to wake up and see what you’ve been doing over my night._

Patton froze. He went into his followers and searched Logan’s URL. The response he got floored him.

_i-will-physically-hug-you: omg!!! i didn’t realize we were mutuals!!!_

Patton could almost imagine Logan’s amused laugh as they responded.

_sherlock-deserved-better: haha, yes we are. i rather enjoy your content, even if it’s mostly reblogs and incorrect quotes. the humor is amusing 9 times out of 10_

_i-will-physically-hug-you: aaaaaaaa THANK YOU!_

_sherlock-deserved-better: it’s not a problem, patton. i like the name, by the way_

_i-will-physically-hug-you: thanks, i picked it myself ;)_

_sherlock-deserved-better: yes, i see in your profile you’re a transman. you’re very brave for being yourself_

_i-will-physically-hug-you: well, my parents aren’t thrilled but they’re accepting enough, and that’s what counts_

_sherlock-deserved-better: i suppose acceptance is all one can ask for sometimes. i don’t even get that, so you are very fortunate_

_i-will-physically-hug-you: you’re not accepted?! that’s no good :( i’m your dad now, and i wholeheartedly accept you!_

_sherlock-deserved-better: i’m older than you_

_i-will-physically-hug-you: still your dad_

Patton didn’t get a response for a few minutes, and he was starting to worry that he might have overstepped a boundary, when he got another message.

_sherlock-deserved-better: got called away for a minute, sorry. if you want to call yourself my dad i can’t exactly stop you, so have fun_

Patton giggled.

_i-will-physically-hug-you: i will have fun! and if i have your permission i’ll make a post about it, too?_

_sherlock-deserved-better: sure. have at it_

With a grin, Patton scrolled to the top of his dash and made a quick post.

**_Hi Guys! Brief Announcement:_ **

_i’m @sherlock-deserved-better’s dad now! i know a lot of you see me reblogging from them, and i’m super excited to tell you guys this is going on! you can keep scrolling now!_

Patton went back to scrolling, but noticed a lot of people reblogging his post, Logan included. He opened a new tab and checked the notes, finding he had a good fifteen in as many minutes. Looking through the reblogs and replies, he saw a lot of squeals and even one or two _Oh my gosh I totally ship you two_ responses. He was blown away. Sure, he had a decent audience, as did Logan, but were they really that popular that people would ship them together, and that him announcing they knew each other would get such a response?

He continued to scroll when XKit let him know he had a new message in his inbox, and he involuntarily smiled. He didn’t know if it would be the little imp, but if it was...

Opening his inbox, he saw the little purple face and he squealed as quietly as he could. This was his favorite anon, one who he’d known pretty much since he had joined the fandom, and they were so sweet, always. _Congrats on being a dad, Pat! Can’t wait to see what you do with your newfound friend/son! -Imp_

Patton smiled. His real-life friends may be busy, but he certainly was having fun with online friends!  _ thanks! it’s so exciting! _ he wrote back by way of reply, and published the ask.

He got another message, and he opened it up to find it was Logan again.

_ sherlock-deserved-better: i didn’t think you would actually do it! _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: i mean what i say, lo, you’ll figure that out fast when you’re friends with me _

_ sherlock-deserved-better: so we’re friends now? _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: if you want. i can be your dad friend. like the mom friend, but male, and with more puns _

_ sherlock-deserved-better: ...fair enough. yes, we can be friends _

Patton cheered and got up in his dorm, jumping up and down in excitement, spinning in circles. He was friends with his favorite Tumblr user, this was absolutely great!

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: yay!!! this is so exciting, you won’t regret it! _

_ sherlock-deserved-better: i would only regret it if you made a pun out of this. one can only take so many jokes at a time _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: there’s never such a thing as too many jokes! _

_ sherlock-deserved-better: agree to disagree _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: ugh, fine. i need to work on homework. talk later? _

_ sherlock-deserved-better: all right. _


	2. Chapter 2

Roman leaned back in his chair and sighed. He did not like this. He was working on a project for the latest fandom “Big Bang” and he and the fic writer could not agree on what he should do for the artwork. “Look, all I’m saying is that the swell of emotion in the climax of the scene deserves to be illustrated!” he argued over the Skype call.

“And I’m telling you, I want to leave it up to the reader’s interpretation!” the fic writer, Virgil, snarked back. “For being such a big artist in the fandom, you’d think you’d be more than a one-trick pony...”

Roman held a hand to his chest and made an affronted noise. “Well I never! I’m not a ‘one trick pony’! I just draw where my muse leads me, and this is where they led me with your work! Why do you want the kiss to not be drawn?!”

“It’s not that I don’t think you could do a good job or whatever,” Virgil said. “But everyone sees the kiss from a slightly different angle. They might see it like in the movies, or they might be imagining it from one of the characters’ perspective. I don’t want to limit their mental image to one snapshot.”

Roman huffed and crossed his arms. As much as he hated it, Virgil had a point. “Okay, fine. But if I don’t illustrate the kiss, then what can I do for art?”

“I don’t know, dude, you’re the one who insists on listening to your muse,” Virgil shrugged.

“But you’re not letting me listen to it! I don’t know where to go from here!” Roman said petulantly. He sighed. “Why do  _ we _ always get paired for the Big Bang challenges?”

“Apparently because people seem to like our collaborations,” Virgil sighed. “Nice talking to you again, by the way.”

“Same to you,” Roman groaned.

Virgil leaned back in the frame and Roman shook his head. “What scene would you most like to see illustrated, then? I might be able to get my muse excited if you’re excited for it.”

Roman frowned as Virgil turned a deep red and looked away from the camera. “There really isn’t one...” he said, clearly a lie.

“Oh come on. We’re both in a fandom, do you really expect me to judge whatever scene you really like?  _ Especially _ after reading every last one of them?” Roman scoffed.

“Well...the one where Steven comes out as non-binary, and Connie hugs them and the gems all show their support in their own ways...that one really matters to me.”

Roman looked back over what Virgil had written at that point. Pearl was looking into everything she could find on non-binary identities, Amethyst found a Pride flag and ran around Steven wearing it like a cape, and Garnet just gave them a smile and a thumbs-up. He smiled. “Oh, that scene’s really cute! I’d love to draw that!”

“You-you would?” Virgil asked, blush fading somewhat.

“Are you kidding me? It’s such a heartfelt moment, and I have a history of drawing teenagers better than adults, anyway. Your continuation on the timeline as Connie and Steven grow up is all really good. And though the kiss scene would be my favorite to draw, this comes in as a close second,” Roman said, smile growing.

“Oh. Well, good. I do like that scene a lot, and I think others will too...” Virgil floundered.

“They’ll love it, Virge, trust me. If even us, two polar opposites in the fandom can agree that it’s a great scene, there’s no one we can’t win over with this story.”

Virgil buried his face in his hands. “Oh, shut up,” he grumbled.

Roman frowned. “Hey, Virge, I have a question...”

Virgil leaned forward where he was sitting again and eyed the camera. “You know I don’t like that phrase Roman, not with my panic disorder.”

“Oh! Right! Sorry. Um, you seem to write a lot of nonbinary characters. Forgive me if I’m out of line but...are you in the closet?” Roman asked.

“I’m cis, Ro,” Virgil said. “I just happen to like exploring non-binary identities with these characters, especially considering Rose Quartz and the others were technically agender, so why should Steven automatically have a binary view on it?”

“Fair point,” Roman conceded. “Hey, what time is it for you there?” Roman asked.

“Hm? Oh, just around midnight,” Virgil said casually.

“Virgil!” Roman exclaimed. “Don’t you have school tomorrow?!”

“Yeah,” Virgil shrugged. “Don’t you?”

“It’s only nine in the afternoon where I live!” Roman exclaimed.

Virgil’s eyes lit up. “You made a  _ Panic! At the Disco _ reference!” he exclaimed.

Roman went over what he said and mentally facepalmed. “It’s your fault for always saying it.”

“Yeah, but you picked it up!” Virgil crowed. “All right. I’m gonna go to bed, my class starts at ten tomorrow morning. Send me a sketch of what you plan on doing?”

“You know it,” Roman sighed.

Virgil signed off Skype and Roman grabbed his drawing tablet and opened up Photoshop to start drawing. After some quick gesture sketches, he decided he’d rather be on Tumblr for the time being and checked on his dash.  _ i-will-physically-fight-you _ seemed to be a trending blog recently, along with  _ sherlock-deserved-better _ . Roman knew the second one a little better, they had done the meta on why Cookie Cat was such an important ice cream to Steven, and had since done more and more obscure meta’s, until they had caught on that most of requests were spamming for jokes and kept to the larger headcanons for the most part. It seemed that  _ i-will-physically-fight-you _ was becoming fast friends with  _ sherlock-deserved-better _ , and the two were commonly shipped together.

Roman laughed quietly to himself. That was just adorable. He looked at  _ i-will-physically-fight-you’s _ page and smiled softly at the pastel blue theme he was greeted with. The description read:  _ Patton, 19, FtM. @sherlock-deserved-better is my child. Steven Universe, Harry Potter, and baby animals abound _

How cute! Roman scrolled through the blog and found that there was a lot of Steven Universe right off the bat. Mostly reblogged, but some original puns. Most noticeable on  _ sherlock-deserved-better’s _ metas. That was...adorable! He couldn’t believe that something this precious could exist in the real world! He could believe why they were being shipped.

Scrolling further, he found a pun that struck him just the right way, and he was in near tears after reading it. “Wh-what do you call a spiky gem... _ Amethystle?! _ ” he laughed. “Oh, I have to draw that!”

He grabbed his tablet and made a little doodle, reblogged the post with it, and thought nothing more of it. It was a funny joke, but he wanted to read through some of  _ sherlock-deserved-better _ as well as  _ i-will-physically-hug-you _ , so he moved on and put the joke in the back of his mind, resolving to check on it later.


	3. Chapter 3

Virgil couldn’t believe it. He just...couldn’t believe it. He had checked his Tumblr dash before going to his classes and was stunned to find a hastily-drawn doodle of Amethyst as some sort of flower all over his dash, coming from  _ gayerthanyxu _ , but originating from none other than  _ i-will-physically-hug-you _ . And he wasn’t sure whether to be more exasperated or elated that this was building up so much.

_ i-will-physically-fight-you  _ had been his ultimate friend crush for quite some time, and Virgil frequently sent anonymous asks, signing them with the little devil emoji. He had been jealous of when Patton announced  _ sherlock-deserved-better _ was his fandom child, but if Patton was happy that was all that really mattered to Virgil. But now Roman was  _ also _ sharing the spotlight with Patton, and  _ they’d _ get closer, and all Virgil would ever be was this tiny little anon, a blip in Patton’s radar and nothing more.

He had stewed in his own self-pity for the entirety of his morning classes, and now he was eating lunch, looking at Patton’s blog, and trying to quell his shaking hands and hammering heart. Because he, in a moment of weakness, sent Patton an ask saying he was worried that because of all of this, he would be forgotten, and Patton said he never would be, no matter what. But Virgil still considered revealing who he was, nonetheless. Because that, at least, would mean that Patton couldn’t forget him.

His own username taunted him in Patton’s askbox, the simple message,  _ I am  _ _ Imp _ _ , hope you don’t mind my showing my face, _ mocking him.

Screw it. Virgil was not one to be mocked and he had always been impulsive underneath his panic disorder. He pushed the ask button and the cheery message informing him it had been sent popped up. His heart was hammering harder now, and he wasn’t expecting much of a response for a while, so he had plenty of time to panic. Or so he thought, anyway.

As soon as he moved to his dash, he saw  _ trashcan-icannot _ in an ask on Patton’s blog. But more than anything else, Patton’s response made him want to choke on his sandwich.  _ ohmygoodness hello!!! i love love LOVE your blog, it’s so cool that you’re talking to me! please feel free to send me more asks, i love you so much (platonically, of course! <3) _

Virgil thought he might faint. A grin split his face. Patton...didn’t mind! Moreover, Patton thought he was  _ cool _ ! He thought he just might die of happiness then and there. He sent Patton a message.

_ trashcan-icannot: is a message equivalent to an ask? _

The response he got was immediate.

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: yes, yes it is! i love your blog, and all your work! it’s so good, your fanfiction brings tears to my eyes! _

_ trashcan-icannot: oh my gosh you’re going to make me blush so hard my face catches fire. i’m glad you’re a fan, though. i love your blog more than words can say <3 _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: well, we’re just two regular nerds, huh? this is cool! _

_ trashcan-icannot: i never thought i would do this tbh. the only reason i did was because i was worried between logan and roman you’d forget about me _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: aww, i could never forget you! you were my first friend in this fandom, there’s no way i could EVER forget about you! _

Virgil smiled despite himself.

_ trashcan-icannot: you were my first friend on tumblr, period. i never was that good at socializing _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: i was pretty good at making friends when i was younger but now it’s kinda hard. between transphobes and misinformed allies most of my friends are in the campus LGBT club _

Virgil sighed. That resonated so similarly to his own story that it hurt.

_ trashcan-icannot: well, now we definitely have each other, huh? and i think we share a timezone? _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: gmt -5, right? _

_ trashcan-icannot: yeah, that’s mine _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: yeah, mine too. this is awesome!!! _

_ trashcan-icannot: i love your enthusiasm _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: i love that you’re not scared by it! XP _

_ trashcan-icannot: why would i be scared of it? it’s endearing! _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: most people are scared off by my enthusiasm _

_ trashcan-icannot: most people are morons, imho. don’t listen to them _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: i guess you have a point, though the way you said it seemed kinda harsh... _

_ trashcan-icannot: eh. I’M naturally kinda harsh. it’s part of my charm ;) _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: you’re really funny! do you have a discord? _

_ trashcan-icannot: ??? yes? _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: can i send you a link to my su server? i think it would be a lot more fun and positive with you there, and i’d love to get to know you better where i can actually read the messages easily. tumblr mobile is a pain _

_ trashcan-icannot: sure, go ahead and link me. what’s the worst that could happen? _

_ i-will-physically-hug-you: yay! okay, give me a second… _

Virgil finished his sandwich and drummed his fingers on his laptop. His anxiety was catching up to him. Sure, people liked his fanfics and they might be nice to him on Discord, but what if they weren’t? He’d only ever used it with fellow writers before, who understood that he could be a bit of a recluse and didn’t take it personally when he decided he didn’t want to talk much that day.

The link popped up and Virgil gulped. Well, he couldn’t back down now. He clicked the link and was taken to his Discord app, where he accepted the invitation to join  _ The Crystal Gems _ and saw that the server was not huge, but by no means small. There had to be about forty people total.

Responses to him joining were immediate.

_ Opal: Oh, new person! Hello! _

_ Peridot: fresh blood! fresh blood! fresh blood! _

_ Papa Patton: heya virgil! hop over into #introductions real quick and then feel free to talk as much as you want! i have class in a few minutes, but i hope to talk to you more soon! _

_ virgilent: okay, yeah, i can do that. talk later. _

_ Papa Patton: great! :) :P _

Virgil shook his head at the emoticons and went into the introductions channel, quickly filling out the necessary information. Virgil, he/him, over 18, and the extra tidbit that he was  _ trashcan-icannot _ and was a fic writer for the fandom. That done, he went back to the general chat and looked at the conversation before he had joined. Apparently they were arguing over  _ sherlock-deserved-better _ ’s latest meta.

_ virgilent: you guys know that the significance of opal’s weapon  _ really _ doesn’t matter much to the overall show? _

_ Opal: oh yeah, we know. it’s just fun to debate theories over meta _

_ virgilent: can’t really argue with that _

_ Peridot: so you’re trashcan-icannot huh? what’s it like being a big fic writer in the fandom? _

_ virgilent: exhausting :P i can’t go a day without some idea popping into my head and i never have the time to write everything. you should see my unfinished docs list _

The conversation continued until Virgil realized he had to get ready for his next class, but by the end of it, he was smiling. This was actually really fun. He was glad he revealed himself to Patton, now.

Dare he say...he might have even gotten a new friend out of it?


	4. Chapter 4

Logan was wondering how they had gotten here. Well, obviously, they had walked to the bus stop and were now on their way to work, but they were speaking in a more metaphorical sense than usual, where they were typing on their phone, on Discord, with one of Patton’s newest recruits to his server, a user who they were informed went by Virgil.

_ virgilent: look, all i’m saying is that i personally don’t see connie weilding the sword while steven using the shield as basis for a theory that connie is the more dominant personality in the relationship. i think it gives them good  _ balance _ , to be sure, but outside of that i’m not sure i really agree with the meta. it’s nothing against you, it’s just my personal opinion _

_ Sherlock Holmes: i understand. perhaps i should have not gotten so passionate about the subject when we were merely discussing weapons that you might use in your latest fanfiction. regardless, it has been enjoyable to debate with you _

_ virgilent: you sound so uptight when you speak like that. it’s kinda endearing, in an annoying sorta way _

Logan made an affronted noise under their breath.

_ Sherlock Holmes: i will have you know that i most certainly am  _ not _ annoying _

_ virgilent: sorry, it was supposed to be a joke. i keep forgetting not everyone shares my love for snark and sarcasm _

_ Sherlock Holmes: well, speaking to only close friends a majority of the time will allow one to forget what outsiders are like. i’m hardly surprised _

_ virgilent: why are the people on this server so understanding? anywhere else and i probably would have been aggressively kicked out and possibly banned by now _

_ Sherlock Holmes: blame the man of sunshine who owns this server. he’s a fantastic influence, and a true follower of the “golden rule” as it were. most of the time i think that i learn more from him than anyone could learn from me, and i’m striving to become a university professor _

There was a pause from the other user which allowed Logan to get lost in their thoughts somewhat. There was something different about Virgil, something that they liked. It was similar to why they decided to message Patton, though it wasn’t quite the same pull.

_ virgilent: that’s a noble goal, teach. good luck _

The conversation was soon taken over by a user whose nickname changed at least twice a week and was currently going by Lapis, and Logan allowed themself to just idly read what was going on with these people they were starting to know, and whose company they greatly enjoyed.

The bus came to a full stop, and Logan glanced up to see that they had arrived at their workplace. They got off the bus and adjusted their coat, shivering in the cold rain. It was still autumn, but just barely. They hated the miserable weather, but supposed they were lucky it wasn’t snow.

When they walked into the Tesco’s, they went to the back without a word, got ready, and then walked out to the floor for another mind-numbing day of retail work.

They tried not to flinch whenever some unassuming older woman would compliment them for being “such a nice man,” or when a little kid would wail too close for them to bear. It was a day where Logan wished they had more spoons than they did. To be misgendered and belittled all day, and then have to go home and continue his studies online while ignoring snide comments from his parents, it was hard to keep going through it every day.

Whenever they got a brief respite, they thought to themself about Virgil and Patton. Both of them were strange characters. They had to admit they were closer to Patton than Virgil, though with the sheer amount of time Logan had talked to Virgil, they were hardly surprised that they were closer to him than most on Patton’s server.

“Hey, Thomas!” their manager called.

Logan tried not to cringe and turned expectantly. “Yeah, Charlie?”

Charlie panted a little before he pointed back from where he came. “Can you clean up aisle eight? Someone decided to throw nearly everything to the ground and leave.”

Logan couldn’t help their next cringe, and sighed in defeat. “Yeah, I can clean it up.”

Charlie grinned and clapped them on the shoulder. “You’re a gem, Thomas. Thank you.”

Logan nodded and walked away, thinking to themself,  _ I know you meant that as a compliment, but the deadnaming rather negates the positive message _ .

There wasn’t anything they could do about it for now, though. They couldn’t risk losing their job, this was the only way they were getting their classes at Uni.

The dreaded aisle eight was an absolute mess and Logan sighed at the sight. It was an aisle that seemed to be cursed with never being clean. If it wasn’t bags of crisps being opened and strewn everywhere, it was all the bags being in the wrong places, tricking the customers into thinking the bags were cheaper than they were, and getting the employees yelled at for mishelving.

Still, they had a job to do, so they slowly and methodically picked up everything that they needed to from its position on the floor and put the bags back in their  _ proper _ places on the shelves. The bending down and standing up over and over was soon giving Logan a headrush, and they tried to bite back the dizziness that was threatening to take over. They  _ knew _ they shouldn’t have stayed up until three last night writing that meta, but they couldn’t resist a challenge, and they had aggressively proved themself superior in their meta skills against a “SU-critical” blog which did nothing much more than spread hate.

Their mind sifting through memories made the dizziness a little easier to bear, and made the time pass faster, and soon they were done cleaning up the aisle. For now, at least. They didn’t know when another person might tear it up.

The rest of their day at work passed mostly uneventfully, and they were relieved to get back on their bus home and scroll through Discord. Virgil was apparently in classes, but Patton was on.

_ Sherlock Holmes: hello, dad. _

_ Papa Patton: heya logan! i hope work was good to you? _

_ Sherlock Holmes: as good as it ever is. how’s everyone here? _

_ Peridot: p good! i just got out of school for the day, which is a HUGE relief _

_ Opal: luckyy, i’m stuck in classes for another three hours _

_ Steven Wannabe: at least you get access to your phone in class. as soon as lunch is over i gotta go. :’( _

_ Sherlock Holmes: i wish you luck, steven _

_ Steven Wannabe: thanks, sherlock _

_ Sherlock Holmes: you know you can always call me logan. you all are about everyone who does, and i appreciate taking advantage of every chance i get to go by my real name _

_ Steven Wannabe: okay. logan. thanks _

_ Sherlock Holmes: any time _

Logan got off the bus and walked into their house, nodding to their mother when she said, “Welcome back, Thomas!” They didn’t argue over their name with her. She never understood, and they really didn’t feel up to a shouting match today.

Instead, they went to their room, and checked online for their homework for the day. They were going to become a professor if it killed them; this was their dream job, and they weren’t going to let  _ anyone _ take that away.


	5. Chapter 5

Roman buried his face in his hands. He was exhausted, ran through the wringer, dead on his feet--or, rather, in his chair. He needed...he needed a drink. And though he was well aware that this was how alcoholism started, he was about to get up and look for some booze when his computer chirped that there was a Skype call for him.

_ Great. What now? I can’t deal with this tonight, _ he thought to himself as he accepted the call.

Virgil’s concerned face greeted him. “Hey, Roman, you okay? I saw your Tumblr post.”

That was all it took for Roman to break, and he choked on a sob, trying to muffle his cries and only being mostly successful.

“Oh my gosh, Ro, what’s going on?!” he asked.

“My...my mom...she’s in the hospital again...” Roman cried.

“In the hospital?!  _ Again _ ?!” Virgil asked incredulously. “What happened?!”

“Th-they...they found her...they found her trying to jump off the highest bridge in town...” Roman sobbed. “And they had to call me, because I’m her emergency contact...I had to give them permission to put her in inpatient; she was...she couldn’t sign the papers herself...” Roman heaved another sob. “Because they had to fish her out of the water and she was in and out of consciousness on the way to the hospital.”

“That’s so...” Virgil trailed off in the way Roman had grown to recognize was him biting back a swear or five. “Roman, are you okay?”

Roman bit his lip and shook his head. “I need a drink,” he said. “I need it bad.”

“That’s not going to do you any good, Ro,” Virgil said.

Roman glared at him. “What do  _ you _ know?!” he growled. “You’re not even old enough to drink yet. You’re twenty.”

“Yeah, I’m twenty, but you know what else I am?” Virgil asked. “A former inpatient. Several times, some attempted, some because I wanted to stop before I attempted. And I know that care isn’t the same all across the country, but I  _ do _ know that they’ll keep your mom alive long enough to get her medication, and hopefully therapy.”

Roman sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. “What if they can’t? Virgil, it’s not exactly a secret that she’s depressed and suicidal. She...she told me point-blank the other day the only reason she lasted as long as she did was to finish raising me. Now that I’m an adult--granted, still living in the same city a few blocks from home, but an adult nonetheless--what if she decides that she’s done all she can and she can’t take it anymore?”

Virgil sighed heavily on his side of the call, and looked Roman dead in the eye, something he almost never did. “Roman, I know your mom is all you have left, but you have to come to terms with the fact that...you can’t save everyone, not every time. Today you were able to help, tomorrow is tomorrow, and it’s all in her hands what she does. You can’t blame yourself for her actions.”

“Again, that’s easy for  _ you _ to say!” Roman snapped.

“Roman, you’re upset. And that’s perfectly okay,” Virgil said. “You feel like the world is ending. You need to take that out on something. I’d prefer it not be me you lash out at, but if you want to just talk, I’m always here.”

Roman was quiet for a minute, thinking over this new information. “I can’t...I can’t lose her, Virgil. I don’t know what I’d do without her.”

“I don’t think you will, not yet,” Virgil soothed. “Her being in the hospital is a good sign. They can help her.”

“But what if they can’t?” Roman asked desperately.

“You can’t focus on the ‘what if’s Roman, that’s how I got panic disorder. I don’t want you dealing with depression or anxiety beyond normal levels. It’s not even remotely fun,” Virgil said.

Roman ran his hands through his hair. “I can’t...I can’t stop it,” he said, voice wavering. “I don’t know how, I can’t...I can’t do this.”

“Hey, Roman, can you breathe with me?” Virgil asked. “In for four seconds, hold your breath for seven seconds, and let it out for eight seconds. It might help you feel better.”

Roman tried to listen to the instructions, but he found he was crying too hard to achieve anything beyond breathing in slowly. “I should go,” he said miserably. “You don’t want to have to deal with me tonight.”

“There’s nothing I’d rather do,” Virgil said sharply. “I want to make sure you’re okay, Ro, for all your faults and all our arguments.”

Roman sniffled. “I can’t do this tonight, I’m sorry.” And he ended the call.

He went to his kitchen and got a drink, coming back to his computer to see his Skype messages blowing up.

_ Virgil: roman don’t you dare drink your problems away, you hear me? _

_ Virgil: this isn’t gonna help your mom, man, i hate to break it to you _

_ Virgil: don’t make me send the fans after you on tumblr _

_ Virgil: roman! please! just say something! i’m worried! _

Roman sighed and shook his head, typing back a quick,  _ leave me alone _ before taking a long dreg of beer.

_ Virgil: roman. if you don’t promise to not get drunk tonight, i WILL send all of my fans to support you. and you KNOW the size of my fanbase _

_ Roman: nothing you can do, my friend. don’t doubt how fast i can go through beers _

_ Virgil: ROMAN. STOP _

_ Roman: no _

_ Virgil: look, man, if you need time alone that’s fine, but you can’t just drink your sorrows away, i don’t want to see you become an alcoholic _

_ Roman: you don’t have to see me at all. you’ll have your art for the big bang, then you never have to talk to me again _

_ Virgil: d***it, roman, you’re my friend, and i care too much about you to cut ties over this, but i can’t have you hurting yourself _

Roman didn’t know how to respond to that. Obviously, he felt a little affectionate to Virgil, in that kid-brother sort of way, but this was the first time Virgil had ever called him a friend seriously. How was he supposed to respond to that.

_ Roman: one beer won’t kill me _

_ Virgil: just promise me you’ll stop at one? :( _

_ Roman: ...fine _

_ Virgil: thank you _

Roman sighed and shook his head, glancing at the time and finding that it was ten at night for him.

_ Roman: it’s 1am for you! Sleep!!! _

_ Virgil: i’d rather make sure you’re okay. i need to finish this essay anyway. do you want to talk? _

_ Roman: ...my mom used to make me edible play-dough, because she could never trust me not to eat it. she’d always laugh after i made my creations and promptly ate them. she’d pretend to be so worried, before i would laugh and tell her it was “the special clay” that she made. she always pretended to be so happy, just for me. it hurt so bad when i realized that wasn’t the truth _

_ Virgil: but if she could do that once she can do it again. she’s lasted this long, that means she’s incredibly tough. you’re not gonna lose her for a while yet, man, i’m sure of it _

_ Roman: that’s nice to hear, but hard to believe _

_ Virgil: ...you know what? i’m siccing my fans on you anyway. you could use the pick me up _

_ Roman: lol. just as long as you don’t tell them why _

_ Virgil: i’ll take this secret to my grave if i have to _


	6. Chapter 6

Virgil knew something was wrong the second Patton answered his call and was fiddling with glasses in his hands. He put them back on his face, pushed them up his nose, and Virgil noticed the tear tracks shining on his cheeks. “Patton, what happened?!” Virgil asked with concern.

“Ran into a bully on the quad,” Patton said with a shrug. “He wasn’t too pleased to see me, said a few things about me being trans, and I was doing a research paper earlier, so I was tired and already sifting through transphobia on Twitter--”

“Patton, slow down, please,” Virgil requested. “What did this guy say?”

Patton rubbed at his eyes and looked away from the screen. “He said that I needed to go back to the girl’s dorms and keep my...my ‘lady parts’ away from the guy’s bathrooms.”

Virgil felt his blood boil on Patton’s behalf. “What?! Patton, why do you put up with this guy?! You could make a harassment claim and get him out of there!”

“But…” Patton swallowed. “He had a hard childhood, and I don’t want to ruin his life...and he’s right.”

“Patton, you don’t have ‘lady parts’,” Virgil growled. “You are a man. Those are men’s parts between your legs, no matter what they are referred to as in textbooks. Clear?”

Patton swiped at his eyes and nodded with a watery smile. “Thanks Virgil.”

Virgil smiled. “Any time. So, moving on to lighter topics? We could go back to the voice chat if you want, or we could continue talking here.”

“Here is fine, I still probably sound like I’m crying,” Patton laughed. “Can I ask you about how you feel about the account  _ gayerthanyxu _ ?”

Virgil groaned. “Nooo, not Roman!” he laughed. “I can’t stand that guy half the time!”

“You guys do such good work together though?” Patton asked.

“You only see the aftermath of our arguments, not the arguments themselves,” Virgil sighed. “Much as he drives me nuts, though, he’s a good friend.”

“Well, that’s good,” Patton said. “I would hate for you to have to be working with an artist that you hated every time you teamed up with someone in those Big Bangs.”

Virgil nodded and sighed. “Yeah, he’s a piece of work sometimes, don’t get me wrong. But he’s ultimately a good guy at heart. I care about him.”

Patton nodded and furrowed his brows. “Is he doing okay? I noticed your post about trying to send people to cheer him up the other day.”

“Yeah, don’t worry, he’s doing fine,” Virgil said. “Just had a bad day.” He didn’t feel like it was his place to talk about Roman’s problems with someone who was essentially a stranger to his friend.

“Okay, that’s good,” Patton said, looking immensely relieved. “I was hoping to maybe talk to him sometime, he drew one of my puns and I really liked his blog.”

“Oh, go for it,” Virgil said. “He loves meeting new people, and he’s a total dork, although he doesn’t look like it.”

Patton grinned widely and brought his hands up to his mouth. “Really?! You think he’s a dork?! He’s such a big blog, he looks so intimidating!”

“He’s not intimidating, Patton, trust me. He might speak a little formally sometimes, and he definitely has a commanding presence, but he’s ultimately just a huge dork looking to make friends.”

“Okay! I’m gonna message him now!” Patton exclaimed.

Virgil checked the time. It was eleven in the morning. “He should be waking up right about now, though his schedule can be unpredictable on the weekends,” he said.

“Oh right. He lives on the west coast, doesn’t he?” Patton asked.

“Yeah. It makes for some interesting conversations, to be sure. Sometimes he just screams at me to go to bed via Skype, sometimes he makes callout posts when I won’t go to bed.”

“Oh, I saw some of those!” Patton exclaimed. “You really should get to bed at regular hours, though. It makes it easier to get up in the mornings.”

“Yeah, whatever,  _ Dad _ ,” Virgil said, voice dripping sarcasm but a smile playing on his lips.

Patton gasped and looked at Virgil with wide eyes. “Can I be the fandom dad? Is that a thing?”

“I think you’ve been the fandom dad for quite a few months,” Virgil laughed. “But if you want to specifically adopt me, then by all means go for it.”

Patton quietly screamed into his hands and Virgil thought it might have just been the cutest thing he had ever seen. “I love you, your bedtime is never, and I fully support you no matter if you’re straight, gay, cis, trans, or any part of your identity is not what is expected of you, and even if it’s what’s expected!”

Virgil laughed. “I really like you, Pat. You’re funny.”

Patton beamed and bounced a little in his seat, and Virgil smiled softly at his newfound friend. This was someone he certainly looked up to, but at the end of the day, he too was just a giant dork with a love for Steven Universe. “Oh, and I saw your conversation with Logan about metas earlier,” Patton said.

“Yeah, I know,” Virgil said. “You told us to play nice. I still think they were being a little ridiculous.”

“Maybe,” Patton said with a shrug. “But they hold themselves very seriously. Just thought you should know. They don’t like when people say they’re being silly. I think it has to do with their parents, though I’ve never pried for specifics.”

Virgil felt something weigh heavy on his chest at that comment. That wasn’t right. No one should have to hate being called something because of their parents. “Thanks for warning me. I might have ragged on them otherwise. I still will, just not about that.”

“Good,” Patton said, nodding slightly. “So...anything else you might want to talk about?”

Virgil thought about it. “Not particularly,” he said with a shrug.

“Okay,” Patton said. “I’m feeling better. I might go to the voice chat now.”

“Nice,” Virgil said. “I know how many people in your server look up to you, they’d be thrilled to get to chat.”

Patton turned a cute shade of pink and Virgil laughed. “I don’t know how to wield that power responsibly,” Patton admitted. “It scares me a bit.”

“I think you’re doing just fine now,” Virgil said. “You’re making sure people are nice to each other, that they have a little sunshine in their day, and that they know how to build each other up rather than tearing them down. You do a good job.”

Patton offered Virgil a grateful smile. “You think so?”

“I  _ know _ so,” Virgil said with certainty. “Now come on, I think the others are probably waiting for us in the voice chat.”

Patton laughed and nodded, before looking very shy. “Virgil...do you think Roman will like me bothering him?”

Virgil sighed. It was so sad that Patton would have to worry about such a thing. “Patton, you’d never be bothering him. That wouldn’t even be a problem. If you still think about it as bothering people, then he’s someone who definitely likes to be bothered. I wouldn’t sweat it too much. Trust me.”

Patton smiled. “Thanks, Virgil. That means a lot.”

“Anytime,” Virgil said. “Anytime.”


	7. Chapter 7

Patton was giggling on his phone in the library while he waited for the computer he was using to boot up. The Discord was buzzing away, and he loved lurking as he waited to get work done. Virgil was doing a lot of talking over the past week, getting used to the size of the server and warming up to the others who he talked to the most. Patton was especially proud whenever he saw Virgil and Logan talking, because Logan’s meta meeting Virgil’s fanfic was virtually unrivaled in awesomeness.

_ virgilent: so, what you’re saying is...if you write a meta about greg universe’s flip-flop tan lines, you want me to nod to it in an upcoming fic? _

_ Sherlock Holmes: yes. problem? _

_ virgilent: well, i think that writing a meta on something so small is ridiculous, but it’s whatever. _

_ Sherlock Holmes: all questions about me writing metas have been serious before this. why would now be any different? _

_ virgilent: because it’s greg universe’s  _ flip-flop tan lines _!!! _

There was a pregnant pause on the server, everyone seemingly holding their breath.

_ Sherlock Holmes: i’m going to write the meta regardless _

_ virgilent: it’s your funeral, man _

_ Papa Patton: now come on, boys, play nice! _

_ virgilent: that  _ is _ nice _

Patton rolled his eyes and shook his head, a small smile on his face. He knew he hadn’t known Virgil  _ or _ Logan for very long, not really. But they already felt like good friends, friends he could trust. Granted, he felt that way about most people on the server, so maybe he shouldn’t just jump straight to conclusions, but...

His computer finally started and he was torn away from his phone to do research for his essay. The topic was something he specifically chose because he could get fired up about it; transgender rights. More specifically, why transgender individuals out of the closet should be allowed to serve in the military.

He knew this wasn’t going to make him many friends; colleges were usually liberal but that didn’t mean that all the people in his classes were. And those who weren’t, infuriatingly enough, seemed to be more popular, gathering people onto their side, the side that whatever Patton did was wrong, and he was just a “confused little girl”. He had learned to  _ hate _ that phrase last year. He had hoped this semester would be different, but the campus was only so big. He still got snide comments from across the quad frequently.

But that wasn’t going to stop him from being himself. He was allowed a single room since he was an Resident Assistant for the freshman dorms, and he enjoyed being able to talk to the new kids and help them figure out things about the campus and about themselves. And he was going to stand up for them, even if he couldn’t stand up for himself.

Sifting through tweets for reliable sources was a nightmare, but Patton was willing to do it if it meant getting a good grade on this paper. If he did a good enough job he might even show it to Logan, see if they approved of it or if it stood up to Logan’s meta. Most of their metas read like college essays to begin with.

His phone buzzed with a notification and he allowed himself to be drawn away from his research just long enough to see that the notification was from Tumblr, and he had an ask.  _ I wonder who that’s from _ , he thought to himself.  _ Ah, I can check on it later _ .

Later wound up being about ten minutes, because sifting through Twitter was incredibly dull. It was from Logan, a quick question from his most recent ask meme.  _ Amethyst: If you could shapeshift into anything, what would you be? _

Patton thought long and hard about how to respond. He was torn between a dog and a cat, because he loved cats, but he didn’t want to be allergic to himself, and he liked dogs, but he didn’t want to be pet by random strangers all the time. Eventually he decided on cat, because personal space was a bit more important to him than allergies.

_ I’d be a cat, Logan! I really really like cats, and plus you don’t get random pets from strangers all the time if you’re a cat like if you were a dog! _ It was a bit of a silly answer, but he enjoyed silly answers. He posted the ask and went back to research.

Half an hour passed and Patton had the required amount of sources he needed for the essay and decided that he’d go back to his dorm and talk to his friends on his personal computer. A little reward for all that work.

Walking across the quad, he saw one of the popular boys who liked to rag on him notice and start his way. “Hey, Patton!” he yelled.

Patton braced himself and forced a smile on his face as he turned to face the boy, whose name he was pretty sure was Preston. “Yeah?” he asked. “Can I help with something?”

“Yeah, you can,” Preston said with a sneer. “You can go back to the girl’s wing of the dorms and keep your lady parts away from the men’s room.”

Patton swallowed and kept the smile on his face. He knew a little bit about Preston, how he had a hard life growing up, what with the birthmark covering half his face, and that now he was at college he was trying to take his power back. It allowed him to empathize a little with the other man, but it didn’t mean his comment didn’t sting.

“Sorry, Preston, but I can’t really do that. You see, I’m a guy, and having a guy living in the girls wing is kinda not good,” Patton said.

Preston sneered. “But you’re not  _ really _ a guy,” he snarled.

Patton’s smile fell a fraction. “Well, you’ll have to tell that to my legal documents,” he said, before walking away.

“You won’t get away with this!” Preston yelled. “I’ll prove to everyone how you’ve deceived them!”

Patton suppressed a shiver and got away as fast as he could without running. Tears were clouding his vision and he was crying by the time he shoved his shaking hands’ keys into his dorm lock. He tried to fight off the thoughts that were taunting him, saying  _ You’re not a guy, never have been and never will be _ , but he didn’t have the energy.

He turned around once in his dorm, locked the door, and sat down heavily at his desk, tears streaming down his face. It got easier, over the years, to ignore the barbs he was thrown, but it always, always stung, and after his research project today? Well, he had enough of a sour mood already that he was surprised it took him that long to cry.

The second he signed onto Discord, Virgil started typing. First a greeting, and then a request to join the voice chat. Patton didn’t really want to, but he didn’t want to say no, either, especially to Virgil, who was still really sensitive about saying the wrong thing in the wrong place.  _ Papa Patton: is it okay if i stay muted? i’m not up for talking right now _

_ virgilent: yeah, sure. so long as you’re okay? _

_ Papa Patton: yeah, don’t worry about me, i’m fine, just dealing with a sore throat _

He joined the voice chat once muted and he was met with a few scattered and quiet cheers. Virgil’s icon lit up and Patton was surprised by the deep voice that greeted him. “Hey, Patton. Nice to talk to you, sorta.”

_ Papa Patton: nice to be here _

“Everything okay? I don’t think you’d usually be the type to be muted, even with a sore throat.”

_ Papa Patton: it’s a long story, and probably one that’s better suited for PM. don’t want to trigger anyone. _

“Fair enough, though that has me worried,” Virgil said. “I could PM you my Skype and we could call there? Or just on here works, too.”

_ Papa Patton: no, skype’s fine by me. i’ll pm you my account _


	8. Chapter 8

Logan blinked disbelievingly at the message he received at noon, from none other than Virgil. The two had grown closer over the past month that they had been talking through Discord, but this question, which he received through his DMs, was completely out of left field.  _ virgilent: can i ask you a question about gender? non-binary genders specifically? _

_ Sherlock Holmes: of course. what do you want to know? _

_ virgilent: a lot of things, honestly. like, what kind of genders are out there? how do you know you’re one of them? what even  _ is _ a gender, to begin with? _

_ Sherlock Holmes: those are hardly specific questions _

_ virgilent: logan...please? i need help _

Logan stared at their computer in consternation. It couldn’t be...but it looked that way.

_ Sherlock Holmes: are you...questioning? _

_ virgilent: apparently? i mean, i wasn’t for the longest time but then i started thinking about it and while being a guy felt kinda right it didn’t feel perfect and i...idk _

_ Sherlock Holmes: okay. well first, you need to breathe. freaking out is going to get you nowhere. second, how does it not feel right? _

_ virgilent: i...like something’s missing, i think. like it feels mostly right, but there’s another piece of the puzzle that i don’t have. _

_ Sherlock Holmes: nothing to be too alarmed about, it is entirely possible that you are nonbinary, and i can assist you in your search for gender. there are many different combinations of genders that qualify as their own, unique genders as well. you may be a demiboy, perhaps. they feel part boy, part something else. _

_ virgilent: i...don’t feel like that’s right. i’m 100% guy, but at the same time 100% something else? wait, that’s not correct math. i just know i feel decidedly like a full guy, not part-guy, but also have parts of something else. _

_ Sherlock Holmes: is this feeling...feminine in nature? _

The response Logan was waiting for took a long time to come to light. Virgil would start typing, then stop. Then start again, then stop. When he finally finished his thought and sent it through, Logan read through it quickly.

_ virgilent: i don’t feel like it is. i don’t know what this feeling could be, because like i said, it’s not a guy feeling. but it doesn’t distinctly feel like a girl, either? not even remotely feminine, actually. _

Logan hummed in thought and drummed their fingers on the table.

_ Sherlock Holmes: but it is there? it’s not the  _ lack _ of a gender that you’re feeling? _

_ virgilent: i don’t know what the lack of a gender feels like, but this certainly isn’t it _

_ Sherlock Holmes: well, whatever you are feeling you are certainly allowed to use the label non-binary for yourself. tell me, does this feel like one separate feeling or two? _

_ virgilent: just one. _

_ Sherlock Holmes: i suspect then you are at the very least bigender. should you choose to use that label, it means you feel like two genders at once, or that you feel like pieces of one gender with another gender filling in the missing pieces, or possibly two different genders fluctuating. you could also of course use the terms genderfluid or possibly genderflux, however genderflux is more the strength of the feeling of gender changing, while genderfluid is more shifting between two or more separate genders _

Logan went back to their textbooks to read, and their eyes didn’t catch movement on the screen in front of them for the time it took for them to read two different pages of the text and annotate them. The answer they got to their information mildly surprised them.

_ virgilent: bigender sounds about right to me. could you help me figure out my second gender? you don’t have to if you don’t want to, but i appreciate having an expert help me _

_ Sherlock Holmes: i am far from an expert, but I am happy to help. can you describe the second feeling? _

_ virgilent: not a girl, but not a boy, either, and definitely not a lack of gender. i care about what it is, so i know i can’t be cassgender, but it feels like some sort of separate...third gender? i don’t know if that’s appropriating a term or not, but it feels like a gender that isn’t guy or girl. _

Logan did a quick google search based on Virgil’s description and their eyes lit up when they saw the first result, and they clicked on it. Briefly reading through the page, it sounded pretty close to what Virgil was describing, so they sent the link to Virgil along with a quick description.

_ Sherlock Holmes: maverique. a third gender that cannot be described in terms of masculinity or femininity, nor is simply androgynous. it is a gender all of its own, with its own ways of expression not tied to the binary in any way _

Logan was surprised at the speed of Virgil’s reply.

_ virgilent: !!!!!!!!!! this is me holy crap!!! logan, you are a lifesaver, i can’t thank you enough! i’m bigender! guy and maverique!!! this is amazing! it makes so much sense too! thank you so much! _

_ Sherlock Holmes: it is my pleasure, to be sure. do you suppose that you’ll be searching for a new name as well? _

_ virgilent: nah, i think i’m okay with Virgil. it’s kinda grown on me, and besides, it never bothered me. only calling myself a guy did _

_ Sherlock Holmes: i am familiar with that feeling. will you be using new pronouns, however? _

_ virgilent: you know, probably, for the days where i’m feeling more maverique than guy. but i’m by-and-large okay with being he/him _

_ Sherlock Holmes: well then. do tell me what you decide on, and i will be sure to use those pronouns accordingly when referring to you to people you are out to. i wish you the best of luck when you decide to come out, if you decide to come out _

_ virgilent: thanks logan _

_ Sherlock Holmes: virgil, i am more than happy to help a friend such as yourself. believe me, i am just as happy as you are, although my text may not show it _

_ virgilent: no, you’re good, my friend. you’re good. _

_ Sherlock Holmes: very well then. good luck, and i’ll talk to you later...my friend _

_ virgilent: see you on the discord and the tumblrs _

Virgil logged off and Logan stared at their computer, wondering what just happened. Virgil...had trusted them enough to come with them about problems with their gender. Virgil...called them a friend. They had called  _ Virgil _ a friend. This was...confusing, but not in a bad way. They went back to their textbooks feeling a warmness in their chest. They needed to study for classes, but they were certainly glad that they could help Virgil first.


	9. Chapter 9

Virgil could feel his heart hammering in his chest. It was a Saturday, and Roman had just logged onto Skype, and Virgil wanted-no,  _ needed _ -to talk to him. He had been talking to Logan back and forth for a week, trying to decide on pronouns, and had found a second set he liked. Which meant that in his mind, he was fully prepared to come out on Tumblr. He just wanted to tell Roman first. Because as much as he hated it sometimes, Roman was his friend. And he wanted to tell Roman before he told his sizeable fanbase. Virgil requested a call with Roman before he lost his nerve, and Roman answered right away. “Hey, Virgil! What’s up?” he asked.

“Oh, uh...not much,” Virgil said, kicking himself. “I just wanted to talk for a bit. Is you mom doing better?”

“Mostly,” Roman said. “She’s on medication and she’s seeing a therapist, which makes me feel marginally better.”

“Good, that’s good,” Virgil said, letting out a shaky breath.

“Are you sure everything is okay, Virgil?” Roman asked, face creasing in concern on Virgil’s laptop screen. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Um...yeah, everything’s okay,” Virgil said with a wavering voice. “Like I said, I just wanted to talk.”

“Okay...” Roman said. “Talk about what?”

Virgil squirmed where he sat and looked everywhere but Roman’s face. “I found out...something important. I’m going to make a Tumblr post about it, but I wanted to tell you first, since you’re one of my best friends. Logan already knows, and Patton suspects it, though he hasn’t said anything.”

Roman’s eyes lit up at the mention of Patton’s name. “You know Patton?” he asked.

“Yeah, yeah, we’re...good friends,” Virgil said with a sheepish grin. “And I think you know Logan a little bit from Patton’s posts.”

Roman nodded. “I’ve been meaning to introduce myself to them,” he said. “They seem like a nice person, if a bit closed off.”

“Yeah,” Virgil said, scratching the back of his neck.

“So, they’re your friends, and I’m your friend, and you wanted to tell your friends something before you made a post about it. Are you leaving Tumblr?” Roman asked.

“No,” Virgil said. “I don’t plan on leaving Tumblr anytime soon, and besides, if I did that I’d be moving all my work somewhere else, wouldn’t I?”

“That’s fair,” Roman conceded. “...You’re not sick, are you?”

“No, Roman, I’m fine. Better than fine, really, just really really nervous right now,” Virgil placated.

“Why are you nervous?” Roman asked.

“Because...because-I’m-trying-to-come-out-to-you-okay?!” Virgil said in a rush.

Roman took a second to respond beyond blinking, during which time Virgil was pretty sure his heart stopped. Then, Roman said slowly. “Okay, so you’re coming out to me. That’s fine, Virgil. I accept you for whoever you are. What did you learn about yourself?”

“Well...it turns out I actually am nonbinary,” Virgil said with a blush. “I’m bigender. The two genders I identify with being guy and maverique, which is a gender that isn’t feminine, or masculine, or androgynous, but it’s not a lack of any of those either.”

“Oh.” Then, “Does that mean you changed your name? Or your pronouns?”

“I’m still going by Virgil, I never had a problem with the name,” Virgil said. “But in addition to going by he/him I’m adding ne/nym/nis to my pronouns. That’s spelled n-y-m, not n-i-m, by the way.”

“Well, good,” Roman said with a nod. “I’m glad you feel more comfortable with yourself now. And...it means a lot that you would tell this to me before just...coming out on Tumblr. Because I know the news would get back to me sooner or later, but I appreciate it being a little more personal for me.”

“Anything for a friend,” Virgil said with a half smile.

Roman gave him a slight grin in return. “Hey, uh, actually...I wanted to ask you about Patton, incidentally. Do you think he’s doing okay?”

“How do you mean?” Virgil asked.

“Well, he seems more tired than normal. And I know he isn’t approaching finals or midterms yet. I just worry that he’s not getting enough sleep,” Roman said.

Virgil thought back on it. Patton had been more tired than usual lately...“I don’t know, but I can check on him soon, or we both could, if you want?”

“Yeah, let’s both check on him. Maybe add Logan to the bunch, too? I know that they worry about Patton as well, we could probably do a conference call, and it would probably help to have more than just us two talking at him,” Roman said.

“Yeah, good idea,” Virgil agreed. “I’ll send them a quick message on Discord and then try and set up a call with all four of us.”

The message was just a quick  _ roman and i are checking up on patton, do you want to join the skype call?  _ to which Logan responded with a quick yes.

Virgil added Logan to their Skype call, and they adjusted their glasses as they nodded their head down in acknowledgement. “Virgil. Roman.”

“Logan, nice to see you,” Roman said. “I do believe we’re mutuals?”

“We are,” Logan confirmed. “What seems to be the matter with Patton?”

“He’s seemed a lot more tired than normal,” Virgil said, cutting right to the chase. “Finals aren’t close enough to be weighing on his mind too heavily and he’s seemed a little more withdrawn on the Discord, too.”

“Ah. That, I have noticed,” Logan said. “What are we going to say to him? I know we can’t just rush right in and ask him what’s wrong, he’ll shut us out and insist he’s fine.”

“I suspect we could start by saying we all wanted to say hello to each other, see how everyone was doing. Get to know friends-of-friends a little better, as well. That should make Patton relax at least a little,” Roman proposed.

“That could work, I think,” Virgil said. “Logan? Thoughts?”

Logan hummed in acknowledgement. “I have some doubts, but you have known Patton the longest, Virgil. I will defer to you. My only condition is if he does not believe us, we’re honest about our intentions. I have to lie enough in my daily life about who I am, I won’t lie to friends as well.”

“That’s fair,” Virgil said, nodding. “If we’re all ready, should we add Patton to the call?”

He got two murmurs of agreement and Virgil requested Patton join, seeing that he was online on Skype. Patton’s face, clearly tired but still trying to look cheery, brightened a bit when he saw everyone. “Oh, all my Tumblr friends in one call, this is amazing! What’s going on, guys and nonbinary pal?”

“Actually, I believe it’s guy and nonbinary  _ pals _ ,” Roman corrected. “But we were just checking in on one another, saying hello, that sort of thing. How have you been?”

Patton’s smile fell a fraction and Virgil knew something was up. “It’s that transphobe kid again, isn’t it?” he asked.

“...Actually, I don’t think so...” Patton said, sighing.

“What happened?” Virgil growled.

Patton shrugged. “Well...”


	10. Chapter 10

“Oh my gosh, Patton, please see sense here!” Virgil exclaimed, and Logan nodded their agreement. “If they’re doing this to you then you don’t have to keep your anons on!”

“But you don’t understand--I need my anons on! For the kids who are too shy to talk to me but want to send nice things, or who need advice! I can’t in good conscience turn my anons off!” Patton protested, feeling his eyes get hot.

“Patton, this ‘deceit’ character who’s using your anons to hate on you must be stopped,” Roman said. “At the very least block their IP address!” Roman pleaded.

“I still think I can get through to them,” Patton insisted. “They just need help, guys, help that I can provide! It’ll be okay!”

Roman sighed, and Patton’s face crumpled. He hated it when the others teamed up to try and tell him what the “right” thing to do was to help himself. “Patton, they’re  _ misgendering _ you. I for one can’t stand by and let this happen.”

“Come on, Roman. This isn’t the first time I’ve been called a girl...like that...” Patton said, looking away.

There was half a beat of silence before the Skype call basically exploded in outrage. “What?!” Logan bellowed at the same time Virgil screeched, “I thought that had finally stopped?!” and Roman exclaimed, “Whoever did that can consider themselves a dead person walking!”

“Guys...calm down, please...” Patton pleaded. “Like I said, it’s not the first time, and the first time doesn’t matter, it just means I’m used to this. I can handle it.”

“I have no doubt you  _ can _ ,” Virgil said. “But that doesn’t mean that you  _ should _ .”

Patton shifted back and forth in his chair. Virgil had...a really good point. Like, a  _ really _ good point. But it upset him to think about turning his anons off. He couldn’t just keep blocking this person, though. “What do I do then?” he asked. “Because I’m not turning anons off.”

“I’ll challenge him to a duel if I must!” Roman said. “I’ll fly across the country just to deck him!”

Virgil laughed. “I might join you!” he exclaimed.

“Guys, please, no fighting...” Patton pleaded. “I’ll just tell this person that if they want to talk to me, they can do it privately, all right? Does that satisfy everyone?”

Logan sighed. “While I do wish that you would close your anons, getting them to talk face-to-face and reducing the amount of negativity you see in your inbox would be beneficial still,” they said.

“Yeah, and if they still give you trouble, at least this way you have a url to block, right?” Virgil asked.

Patton offered a shy grin and said, “I’m glad all of us are getting to talk. I actually wanted to say something to all of you, and this saves me a couple messages.”

“What’s up, Pat?” Virgil asked.

“Well, there’s a con coming up, that’s gonna be held in Washington DC. There’s supposed to be a panel specifically surrounding LGBT+ representation in children’s media...and one of the people helping to run the panel is my friend, and asked me if I would be willing to be on it and talk about Steven Universe, since I know so much about it,” he said, blushing.

“That’s amazing!” Roman exclaimed, at the same time Logan offered Patton a grin and two thumbs-up, and Virgil whooped.

“You’re gonna be on a panel?! That’s amazing!” Virgil exclaimed. “When is the con?”

“U-um...early June?” Patton asked.

Virgil blinked. “Hang on. It wouldn’t happen to be held in a local hotel that’s pretty fancy, and starts with...uh...Apricot-something?”

Patton felt excitement bubble up in his chest. “Yeah, it’s at the Apricot Blossom Hotel! You know it?”

“I have tickets for the con!” Virgil exclaimed.

Patton’s eyes widened and he shoved his fists in front of his mouth right before he screamed.

Roman startled at Patton’s scream and Logan just started typing furiously on their computer. “You said this was early June?” Logan asked.

“Yeah!” Patton said. “I’ve been going to the con for several years now, it’s one of my favorites!”

Logan nodded. “Plane tickets are pretty cheap right now. How much does a room cost?”

“I don’t know...” Patton said, before the words sunk in and his eyes widened. “You want to go?”

“I have to support my adoptive father,” Logan said, eyes sparkling.

“Well, shoot,” Roman said. “If all of you are going I probably should too!”

Patton bounced up and down in his seat. “Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!!!” he exclaimed. “After the panel, or before it, or maybe during, we should totally meet up! I’d love to see you all in person!”

“Well naturally,” Logan said. “The whole point of us joining you and Virgil at the con would be to support you and see you in person.”

“I can’t wait I can’t wait I can’t wait!!!” Patton exclaimed, ready to bounce off the walls of his room. He was getting to meet some of his online friends! He couldn’t believe it.

“This is gonna be epic!” Virgil exclaimed. “I’m looking forward to this so much more now!”

Roman started typing on his computer and he grinned. “I can hardly wait myself,” he said. “Especially if it means getting to meet you all!”

Patton’s mind was racing. There were so many things they could do once they were at the con! They could go out for lunch, take lots of pictures with each other, maybe play some games, and the best part? The con wasn’t happening for a couple months, meaning they all would get to know each other better in the time between then and now! Heck, by the time the con came around they might even be best friends!

Inspiration struck Patton and he opened his Tumblr inbox, looking at the most recent message he had, another hate message from the “Deceit” person. In his reply he just wrote, “You can talk all you want, but you can’t bring me down! I’ve got three good friends who are all going to come support me at a panel at a con I’m going to moderate this summer, and you can never take that away from me! If you want to talk to me more, just drop me a message! I’m afraid that asks are going to get tedious for both of us really fast.”

“Whatcha doin’, Pat?” Virgil asked.

“I just posted a reply to the latest anon message,” Patton said smugly. “Deceit can say whatever he wants, but he’s got nothing on the four of us!”

“True!” Roman exclaimed. “This summer will be an adventure of epic proportions! Until then, how about we play a couple games? I can set up a game of  _ Cards Against Humanity _ online...?”


	11. Chapter 11

Roman couldn’t believe it. He was here. After Logan’s flight abruptly got cancelled and them scrambling to find a new one, and Virgil getting the stomach flu just two weeks before now, and him almost losing the chance to come to the con thanks to his mother’s antics, he was finally about to meet his friends. He could hardly believe he got to call these wonderful people friends, too. It was just unbelievable that the sweet Patton, and loyal Virgil, and genius Logan decided to call him,  _ him _ , a friend.

He was standing outside the hall where Patton’s panel was to be held, the agreed meeting spot between the for of them at the start of the day. He was looking around the bustling crowd frantically, and noticed the familiar purple-dyed hair and glasses of Patton. He could hear a, “Is that...? Holy--it is!” and before he knew what he was doing, he was running through the crowd in full Rose Quartz cosplay, with a huge grin on his face, and he and Patton met each other halfway, tackling each other in a hug.

Patton was laughing and Roman was crying, he was so over the moon. He looked up from where he had been buried in Patton’s shoulder and noticed Virgil standing behind them, looking a little nervous. “You don’t have to hug me if you don’t want to, Virgil, but it’s amazing to see you in person too!”

The smile ne gave him in response was worth it.

Roman and Patton broke out of the hug, Patton panting and fiddling with something under his shirt, presumably his binder. “Wooh,” he breathed. “I understand why you’re not supposed to run in a binder now.”

“Yeah, be careful!” Roman exclaimed.

“I almost didn’t recognize you in full cosplay!” Patton exclaimed, looking him over. “You look amazing!”

Roman beamed. “It was a little bit of a last minute ensemble, but I figured why not go all out? After all, I’m here to have fun and meet friends!”

“Good policy,” Virgil said, not a trace of sarcasm in his tone for once.

Roman looked around them, still beaming. “Have either of you seen Logan, by any chance?”

He felt a tap on his shoulder, and turned to see Logan standing there, smile threatening to break into a full-blown grin. “How nice to see you, Roman,” they said. “And you, Patton and Virgil.”

Logan was quickly encompassed in a hug by Patton and Roman, and they blinked in surprise for a minute even after they broke away. Virgil laughed. “I think you broke them, guys.”

“Hm? No, no, I’m fine,” Logan said. “That was just...rather unexpected.”

“Aw, it’s fine, Logan!” Patton exclaimed. “I’m just really happy to see you! Surprised or not!”

Logan’s smile returned, and Roman felt that there was more to what Logan was smiling about than Patton’s pep. “Yes, well, speaking of surprises, you all know I am finishing my Master’s in Education soon?”

“Yeah,” Virgil said. “It’s been all you’ve been talking about in the Discord for a couple weeks, and we’re all really happy for you. What’s that have to do with surprises?”

Logan’s smile turned into a grin, and the light bulb went off in Roman’s head. “You got a job offer already? Judging by the surprise part it must be a pretty good one!”

“It is,” they said with a laugh. “And it’s at Patton’s University.”

There was a moment of silence as everyone let that sink in. Then Patton squealed, and launched himself at Logan again. “Oh my gosh really?! You really mean it?! You’re gonna be a Professor at my college?! That’s amazing!”

“At this rate I’ll have to move out here as well,” Roman laughed.

“I’ll split apartment rent with you,” Virgil offered.

Roman looked over at nym. “Virgil, I was just joking.”

Virgil shrugged in nis patched-up hoodie. “I’m not. I’ve been looking for a place so I don’t have to be stuck in dorms for college. You find a job and pay for half, I can pay the other half with whatever job I get on campus, we could move in together at least until we both get on our feet, or possibly longer if we decide we like it.”

Patton squealed. “We could all live near each other, that’s amazing! I would  _ so _ love to have movie marathons in person, and show you all how well I can cook, and and and! I’m just so excited!”

“I can tell,” Logan deadpanned.

Patton shook his head and laughed more, bouncing on his toes. “This is amazing! I can’t believe it! I’m just so happy you guys, you have no idea!”

Roman offered Patton a grin and said, “Well, I suppose we have a lot of things to talk about after the panel, then?”

Patton nodded. “Oh yeah! Living arrangements if you want to move over here, for sure! I could probably help you find jobs wherever you’re looking, I have a knack for helping people!”

“And I’d be more than willing to look for a place to share with you,” Virgil shrugged. “Insufferable as you are at times, you’re my friend, and also my ticket out of the dorms.”

“I’d be more than willing to assist all of you in furthering your educations,” Logan said. “I have been informed I am quite the tutor, and I appreciate anyone who wants to learn, no matter how easily they pick up the material.”

Roman checked the time. Patton probably had to leave to help set up the panel soon. “You should probably go, Patton. Us three will find seats and we can talk more after your starring performance, sound good?”

Patton checked the time on his phone and nodded. “Oh, yeah, good call, Roman. I’ll be here at the end of the panel, maybe we can walk around the Artist’s Alley some afterwards?”

“I would enjoy Artist’s Alley,” Virgil piped up.

“Then that’s what we’ll do,” Logan said with certainty. “You go get set up, Patton. We’ll get the first row of non-VIP seats.”

Patton nodded, giving Roman, Logan, and Virgil each one hug, before waving and running into the panel room. “He’s going to ruin his ribs if he keeps running in that binder,” Logan sighed.

“Let him live a little, Lo. He’s excited,” Roman said, a grin breaking out on his face again. “Maybe after we explore Artist’s Alley we could see about playing some in-person  _ Cards Against Humanity _ with anyone else who wants to join? I know you two have very warped senses of humor when you come down to it.”

Logan’s lips twitched up. “That seems to be your favorite pastime when you want to get to know us, but I’ll allow it, since we have so much to talk about.”

“Yeah, I’m with Logan. We can’t do it every time we see each other, but for now it’ll be fine.”

The three walked into the panel room, where everyone appeared to be setting up, since there was no previous panel that needed to wrap up. Patton waved to them from the stage excitedly. “He’s a nerd,” Virgil said fondly.

“I think you’ll find that we are all nerds, Virgil,” Logan said.

Virgil rolled nis eyes. “You know what I mean,” ne accused.

“Yes I do. And I agree,” Logan said, walking forward to find a seat. “But it doesn’t make my statement any less true.”

Roman let them talk while he followed them and got comfortable in his own seat. He was beaming inwardly. He got to meet his friends in-person for the first time, and was even getting close to the possibility of moving in with one of them, the others just being a couple hours away on the outside! He couldn’t imagine his day getting any better!


	12. Chapter 12

Logan cleared their throat once again in the bathroom, staring at themself in the mirror, adjusting their necktie. Patton’s words from the night before were ringing in his mind.  _ “You’re going to do great, Lo! Don’t stress about what the students might think of you and just focus on the material! I’ll help you with the LGBTQ club tomorrow night!” _

Despite the encouragement, Logan still felt nervous. This was their first day on the job, and it had only been a month since they had moved back to America. They hadn’t spoken to their parents since they had legally started to change their name, and they wish that didn’t sting as much as it did.

They left the bathroom and walked down the hallway full of classrooms to the one they were going to be teaching in, and set up their papers full of notes for the day. They were going to enjoy teaching astronomy, but that didn’t mean they weren’t still nervous.

Patton poked his head in the door. “Hey, Professor!” he exclaimed. “Just wanted to stop by on my way to class to say I’m glad you’re here, and I’m looking forward to the LGBTQ club tonight! I’m sure everyone will love to see you there!”

Logan felt themself smile and they nodded. They didn’t need their biological family. Not while they had Patton around, and Virgil and Roman were one phone call away. “Thanks, Patton,” Logan said. “It still feels weird being called Professor.”

“Well, you earned it!” Patton said. “And I’m proud of you! It’s weird to think that in less than two years, I’m going to need to find a job like you!”

Logan sniffed. “Yeah? Well, it’s easier than it sounds, most of the time. You just have to figure out how to highlight your strengths.”

“I might have to ask your advice on that,” Patton said.

“I’d be more than happy to teach you,” Logan replied.

Patton grinned. “Thanks, Professor. I’ll see you tonight!”

Logan couldn’t help the smile that grew when Patton left. It was weird, having one of his best friends be a student at the school he was teaching at, but Patton wasn’t majoring in anything that Logan would be teaching on, so they wouldn’t have a conflict of interest.

As students started to trickle in, Logan greeted them. Some of them nodded back, some of them simply said, “Professor,” and a few smiled at them.

“All right, students,” Logan said. “My name is Professor Sanders, and you can address me as such, I’ll be teaching your astronomy class this year. If you aren’t scheduled for Astronomy, now would be the ideal time to leave.”

No one scurried out of the room in a rush, so Logan nodded. “All right. Then let’s get started.”

The classes they taught that day were pretty good, all in all. Only two students wound up being in the wrong classroom, and everyone paid well-enough attention to the syllabus that they were confident they wouldn’t have many issues with slackers.

That night, they went to where the LGBTQ club was being held, and found that they and Patton were the first two people there. “Hello, Patton,” Logan greeted, leaning against the teachers’ desk and offering a small grin.

“Professor Sanders,” Patton greeted back. “Is it weird that I didn’t know your last name until today?”

“Not really, I still don’t know yours,” Logan replied.

Patton grinned. “It’s Gaines,” he said. “I’m Patton Morgan Gaines.”

“Morgan?” Logan questioned.

Patton nodded. “Yeah, I just liked the ring of it. Not enough for it to be my first name, though.”

“I was thinking you would go for something more...masculine. I suppose I shouldn’t have made such assumptions,” Logan said, blush creeping up their cheeks.

“Aw, it’s fine, Logan! What I don’t often show is that I  _ do _ have a feminine side! It’s just very hard to show that when you’re very early in transition when it comes to hormones. Wearing dresses or flower crowns is...different when you can pass as opposed to when you can’t,” Patton said with a shrug. “But it’s okay! Because I recently started HRT, as you know! And that means my voice is gonna get deeper than it already is, and I might be able to grow a beard, if I’m lucky!”

Logan smiled at Patton’s enthusiasm. “Sometimes it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. If I could, I’d swap bodies with you. Maybe then people would be more inclined to see me as nonbinary.”

Patton scuffed their foot on the floor and looked away. “Yeah, it’s unfortunate that a lot of people don’t like seeing AMAB people as more than men or trans women. It’s really frustrating to not be seen as a man, by everyone, I can’t imagine what it must be like to have everyone see you as some...some...I don’t know what word I’m looking for, but someone who’s just...plain crazy, I guess?”

Logan nodded. “It would be nice to have people not refer to me as ‘Thomas’ all the time,” they admitted. “It’s hard to smile when they say that. But I’m getting my name legally changed very, very soon. And then the odds of me being deadnamed will get that much smaller.”

Patton grinned. “I know! It’s so exciting!”

A young man walked in with a birthmark covering half his face and Patton’s smile fell. Logan looked between the two. “Patton, do you know this man?”

“Aw, look at this! Our little girl’s finally growing up and got herself a boyfriend!” the boy snickered.

Logan’s eyes flashed dark as Patton flinched. “Come again?” he growled.

The man continued to laugh. “You know she’s just deceiving everyone, right? Convincing everyone that she’s somehow a boy when she’s  _ not!” _

“Ah. I see the problem here,” Logan said calmly. “You’re a bigot.”

Patton whispered, “Logan, please, leave him alone.”

Logan shook their head.

“What’s the matter,  _ Patricia?” _ the man gloated. “Upset that your secret’s out? You seemed more than happy to rub your new friends in my face last year on that stupid blog you have, where are they now, huh?”

“Right here,” Logan growled, stretching up to his full height and stalking over to the young man. “And if you don’t leave now, I will make you leave. The whole school. Perhaps you didn’t know, my name’s Professor Sanders, and I work here.”

The man paled significantly, and quickly left the room. Logan turned to Patton. “Well, I sincerely doubt he’ll be bothering you again,” Logan said calmly. “Do you know him?”

“That’s...that’s Preston,” Patton said. “He was...he was the hate anon? How did he even figure out that I had a Tumblr? I don’t...I don’t understand...”

Logan walked over to Patton and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “You might never understand. I certainly don’t understand why people would spread mindless hate like that. But if he ever, and I mean  _ ever, _ bothers you again, you let me know and I’ll get him kicked out. Okay?”

Patton swallowed. “I don’t want him kicked out, I just want for him to leave me alone.”

“In the case you can’t have that, will you let me know?” Logan pressed.

Patton swallowed and nodded. “Yeah, Lo. I’ll let you know.”

Logan smiled and other students started to trickle in. This was going to be an interesting night.


	13. Chapter 13

Life continued on for the four after that. Logan continued with their job, and soon became a very popular professor. They worked toward their doctorate as they teached, and Patton, Virgil, and Roman supported them the whole way. When Logan was first addressed as “Dr. Sanders,” Patton ran up to them and hugged them until they almost couldn’t breathe.

Patton worked toward a degree in Gender Studies and got a Master’s to become a licensed therapist. His specialty was LGBTQ youth, and he always made a point to be an activist in his local branches of advocacy groups. He and Logan eventually moved in together as queerplatonic partners, and to cut down on rent for both of them.

Virgil went on to become a renowned author. Nis writing skills were only rivalled by nis love of Mathematics, and when ne could afford to thanks to the money ne made from nis books, he went back to school and got a degree in the STEM field he had always admired.

Roman continued to work day jobs here and there, and got involved in the local theatre, enjoying all their productions and even performing in a few of them himself. He grew a name for himself and eventually got to move to New York to become a part of Broadway. The other three continued to support him, and Virgil moved just outside of the city to be close to Roman, under the disguise of “my muse sings to me when I’m around so many people.”

Their lives were not necessarily the most exciting one could have, but they all achieved their goals in ways that they wanted. Despite what other people would say to them about keeping in contact online, they never lost their friendship for each other, and they Skyped or visited every chance they got.

Patton got the top surgery he needed and continued HRT for the rest of his life. Logan became one of the first legal nonbinary persons in the USA, Virgil following shortly afterward. They may only be recognized as nonbinary in the states of Maryland and New York, but that was enough for them, for now. The “M” on their passports might one day prove to be “X”s.

Life didn’t have to be glamorous for it to be enjoyable, and these four, these beautiful, brave four made it theirs and theirs alone. And they were happier for it. Sometimes, when they were feeling nostalgic, they might all climb on their computers, set up a stream together, and watch the very show that brought them together in the first place. It may have been designed for kids, but these adults loved Steven Universe with all their hearts, and they never, ever stopped. And you know what?

None of them would have had it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are appreciated, but never required! <3


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